Zombies Have Attacked….

If zombies attack, I am not entirely sure what I would do, but I am pretty sure I would pull a “Home Alone” and booby-trap my way to survival. Now, I will be honest and say that I do not know much about zombies, but I am going to be working off the idea that they are something like other mythical creatures. First things first, the doors- I would hang garlic wreaths on each one (does that only work for vampires?). Next thing, Kryptonite will be sprinkled on the floor (does that only work for Superman?). And to make sure they are gone for good, I will have a bucket of water with me ready to melt them (does that only work for wicked witches?). This is my zombie survival plan, unless you answered “yes” to any of my previous questions in which case, gosh darn it, I guess the zombies would get me.

Why hello there says the Killer Clown

What scares me the most?
Clowns and dolls.

I've always had a problem with those gross little beady eyes or the giggling and constant feigned happiness, the whole fake, masked attribute to both of them. With dolls, I hate how they are always staring. I don't like when people stare, but a doll never stops staring. It seems like it sees everything, remembers everything, and I know it's hollow and incapable of actually doing anything but I still feel it watching me. I still feel like its creeping up to murder me. With clowns, I feel like the only people who become clowns are the ones with something to hide. There's no other reason you paint a mask onto yourself and spend your time giggling at little kids. It just isn't done. Also John Wayne Gacy didn't help. Another thing that didn't help is when a certain pair of jokers thought it would be funny to trap me in a room of dolls. Lusi and Callie. Not cool... not cool.

Post 9

I was asleep. In my dream there was a loud ringing and knocking. Then I woke up and there was still a loud ringing and knocking. I realized someone was trying to get into the house. There was nothing I could do about it either I was terrified. "lets try to get in through the window" I heard something say... I dashed across the house to the phone and called the police. They said they had someone on the way then the line cut dead.. "Madison Madison" I whispered trying to find my sister.. I thought the thing had gotten in and took her.. But she was in her room trying to save herself instead of being selfless.. I heard something walking upstairs.. Thump Thump Thump then silence... "Madison I think it's alright, it may just be Carli" I said before making her check downstairs. She never came back..

Nowhere to Run

We were coming back from visiting yet another one of our many family members. I was in the car with my uncle, his new wife, my cousin, and my sister. It was already dark and the weather had started to drop. My little sister was making us all laugh, rhyming adjectives that described her. All of a sudden, my uncle stopped the car and we were pushed forward in our seats. There was a loud thud as we saw a man roll over the hood of the car. Not even a few seconds later, three other men were running past our car. There was a traffic jam ahead of us and nowhere to go. My uncle yelled at us to get down on the floor… to hide. We saw the police car lights arrive and I heard my uncle let go a sigh of relief. They, too, hurried past our car. We heard gunshots ahead of us and I felt my cousin jump next to me. I put my arm around her and as I did I saw that there was someone at the window. Someone telling us to be quiet. Someone holding a gun. Someone laughing. I nudged my uncle’s wife to turn around. But when she did, it was too late. He was gone.

boo.

I am scared of many things, but if I had to choose one thing that scares me the most, it would be alligators/crocodiles. when I was three years old, my mom and I went on a "river ride" in an alligator swamp. as a small three year old the alligators were bigger than I was, heck, their mouths alone were bigger than I was. this is where my fear began. although I do not remember this, the story had been told to me multiple times, and I can definitely see its repercussions. my dad lives in Florida, and since I was 5, old enough to be away from my mom for an extended period of time, I have been spending my summers there. naturally I have made some friends, one in particular, Hannah, is my best friend and when I visit my dad I probably spend more time with her and her family than I do with my own. hannah, her sister and I would offer play a game in their neighborhood, kinda like man hunt during the day. hannah and I would ride our bikes around and taylor would essentially try to find us and then chase us, Hannah's room was base. in the pond behind their house lived a crocodile, in the past their had been multiple an only lived in there for a month until animal control or whatever came and got it. at the time, we did not know there was a crocodile in there. so when we were playing and it began to rain, and when it rains the pond raises, VERY quickly. hannah and I were hiding on the pother side of the neighborhood when suddenly taylor found us and started riding towards us. the pond had already risen but we took our chances and started making our way towards Hannah's house treading through the muddy water, dragging our bikes behind us. the water was only to our ankles and we were in the homestretch to Hannah's when we reached the ditch between Hannah's and her neighbors, here the water would come past our waists. hannah and I frantically weighed the decisions when I happen to look to the left and saw the crocodile swimming towards us. we both started crying and ran to the other side. we probably cried for about an hour after that, and that was the last time we played that game.

Irrational Fear

My biggest fear is hardly supernatural (though I am also much too frightened by the supernatural as well) and happens to pop up a bit too much for my liking. You see, I am afraid of heights. Some people might try to be  smart and just say that they're afraid of hitting the ground more so than of the height itself, but I feel my fear is better described as a fear of heights. Now, if my fear was rational then it would make sense to say that it's a fear of hitting the ground; however, there's hardly a rational thought in my fear, hence my preference for "fear of heights". I can't even remember when it started, and one of my earlier memories is of me in Kindergarten staring down the firefighter pole on the playgound, wanting so badly to go down it and prove that I could, but being much to scared to even attempt it. I did, eventually, go down it, but that was after several months of this and with my Kindergarten teacher standing at the bottom, hovering over me as I went down.

It's not just something that happened when I was little. I still get jumpy around heights, and when we drive home to visit my family or to visit my hometown and we must go through the towering Smokies, I look out over the landscape with both fear and awe (I mean, I realize that it's pretty. I'm just hoping my dad doesn't go around a curve just a wee bit too fast.) Within the past few year (I can't remember what year exactly, just that it was over Spring Break) my family and I went on a trip to Red River Gorge. It was terrifying. For someone who both hates walking too much and heights, it was truly the worst. For it became a routine; walk for three quarters of a mile so that I could have a panic attack on the side of a cliff, then walk the three quarters back and then do it all over again somewhere else. I broke into tears and curled into a ball at one, and at another I had to lay down on my back in the middle of the trail while my family scrambled around the peak and walked over the creaky stairs up to one specific peak. My mom still has pictures of me huddled in a ball at one point where I just stopped hiking and let my family go on while I watched them. I played in the dirt and tried not to think about how high I was or where we were.

As one can see, it's really just an irrational fear. While some people can track their fear to one specific part of their life, one instance which started it, I can't for the life of me remember what might have caused it. I have my suspicions that it might have been something my dad did, but other than that I can't really figure it out. Though I doubt that would really help me, in the end.

Wolves

Wolves are the scariest thing in the world.
 Or the world in my head at least. I have many many irrational fears, including but not limited to audience participation during a show, having to use those orange things in the plane that give you oxygen while you are plummeting to a watery death, ect. I could go on and on but the one thing that I am most deeply terrified of is wolves. It goes back to one June night when I was seven. It was hot, too hot to sleep with the covers on (always a bad idea) and after finally finding the coldest spot on my pillow I fell asleep. It was the kind I night where all the windows were open and the mosquitoes buzzed around my head. I had left my dream catcher in the car so I knew it was coming. I was in a car driving to the beach. Our Subaru, which made total sense at the time other than the fact the my old dog was panting behind me and we bought that car after he died. I was sleep so I leaned against the car window and closed my eyes. I was daytime but car trips warranted unending naps and songs. When I opened my eyes I saw a paw. Out of the corner of my eye but I saw it. It had dirt between the claws and coarse grey hair grew in tufts around it. I squeezed my eyes shut and it was gone. I kept napping thinking I had dreamed it. When I opened my eyes again it was slow, just like in the movies when the screen blinks back and forth from black to a blurry reality, but in that moment I saw the worst thing any six year old can see. A wolf to rival all wolves. His head had replaced the paw and his teeth was covered in blood and his tongue hung lazily out of his mouth. And just as he opened his mouth to say something to me I woke up in a cold sweat. For some reason, ever since that night I have been absolutely terrified of wolves. Not the cute ones at the zoo but the ones in the storybooks and pictures. I couldn't read the tale about Red and her Grandmother and I spent every story time in the hall when we listened to Peter and the Wolf during story time. Since then I have grown up and learned to get over childhood insecurities and fears but I have never been able to shake my fear of wolves. I wonder if I ever can?

Assignment 10: What is it good for?

Genocide in Sudan

North Korea testing nuclear weapons

Iran creating nuclear weapons

Terrorism

Injustices and threats surround so many lives in this world. When injustices or threats progress to dangerous and harmful levels though, it seems logical for war to come into play as a way to combat the situation....maybe.

Is there a time for war?

If there is a time, is it morally right and just or is is it the lesser of two evils?

If there isn't a time, why not?

Are there certain times when countries have a responsibility to go to war?

Are there any alternatives? Could they be more effective or less effective?

Due Sunday, November 11th at 11:59 pm

Pressure

It's 7:27 am this Saturday morning and I'm back at Henry Clay. The administrators are just beginning to set up the tables for registration which starts in 15 minutes. See, this is one of my biggest flaws: having the tendency to come early, even to events I find no particular enjoyment in. It's 7:32. Registration in 12 minutes, actual SAT in less than an hour. My palms are beginning to sweat. Standardized testing is not my forte. Actually, it can easily be said its my biggest fear. They tell you to relax and get a good nights sleep but how in the world is that possible knowing that the next day, before sunrise, you will be forced to sit in a room and determine your entire fate. That's just too much pressure. I mean we've all been in the same situation. You find yourself in a room in the early hours of the morning functioning on a restless night of tossing and turning. The teacher, it seems as if, is glaring you down waiting for you to mess up, to ruin your life. The clock mounted ONTHE wall sounds as if it's getting louder and louder with each passing tick...tock...tick...tock.  Oh god, 5 minutes until registration; 50 minutes until the test. Why do I choose to inflict this pain upon myself. I am in no way helping myself by psyching myself out this way. I could even potentially be impeding my score. This was just how I felt last year before the AP World History test except last year the panic got so bad I backed out of the test the morning of. Wimp, I know. But as I've said, standardized tests freak me out- the pressure is too great. Hopefully, this Sapnish Subject Test will go differently and I can finally overcome my fear. It's now 7:45 and time for registration. Time to approach the table and my fate.

Assignment 9: BOO

ZOMBIES HAVE ATTACKED. Detail your survival plan.
(This prompt comes from blog 6. Thank you, Ned Katz and Bram Dutch)

OR

Explain what scares you the most and why.

OR

Describe a moment in which you were fraught with peril. Tell it as a ghost story.

Happy Halloween!

Minimum of 150 words - due Sunday, November 4 at 11:59 pm

Well color me nostalgic.

Writing Territories
Fears - growth
Annoyances - born entitlement
Accomplishments - trust
Confusions - emotions
Sorrows - loss 
Dreams - legacy
Idiosyncrasies - affectionate
Risks - trust
Beloved Possessions, Now and Then - cd player, 120 ct box of crayons
Problems - secrets

It still upsets me that I don't know where my box of crayons is.  It's caused a few fights between my mother and me, actually.  I can't help it if I'm sixteen and my favorite pastime is still coloring.  I know it's a shared interest with other high schoolers; they just aren't as passionate as I am about it. And crayons are better than colored pencils and markers.  They fit in the hand better.  If they break into tiny pieces (and we all know what that's like) they can be melted into original colors and new crayons.  They remind us of what being a kid is.  They allow all of the memories to come back of kindergarten, of the cards we made for our moms on Mother's Day, of the first time we didn't go outside any lines.  The word itself just looks so creative.  If only I had my box...

Writing Territories

Fears: Heights, Not being good enough

Annoyances: BEING LATE

Accomplishments: Getting into NYLF

Confusions: People

Sorrows: Not trying hard enough Freshman year

Dreams: Becoming a surgeon

Idiosyncrasies: Books

Risks: Helicopter!!

Beloved Possessions, Now and Then:  Goloso (then), my sisters (now)

Problems: Motivation

This summer I went to Boston for a leadership Forum. We were broken up into smaller groups for MED Sessions. We were the Williams Group and our "team leader" was Hysem Eldik and the first thing he said to us was: "You're all late. From now on, get here five minutes early. Five minutes early, or you're late." So every morning, we'd be the first to get up and to every event, we'd always be the first to arrive. For most in my group, it took a while getting used to; but for me, I absolutely loved it. Then I came back home. When my parents and sister decide they will be early, then they will be on time. Then and only then will we be on time, otherwise we are late, as usual. So whenever I want to get to school at 7:30, I tell my parents I need to get there at 7:15. Because the worst thing for me to be, is late. 

I Come From a Land Down Under

Fear: The Future
Annoyances: Attention Seekers
Accomplishments: Growing Up
Confusions: Not thinking of Others
Sorrows: Drama
Dreams: Being on SNL, Living in Australia
Idiosyncrasies: Dumb Blonde
Risks: Putting Myself Out There(Vulnerability)
Beloved Possessions: Then- Bitty Baby and my Bankie(it's a blanket) Now: Music and Bankie
Problems: Motivation(for certain things)

I am not a fan of being cooped up in tight places. My legs feel tight after awhile, I can't find a comfortable position, my butt goes numb, I get hot and I just want to be able to stretch; yet one of my biggest dreams is to live, for any amount of time, in a place about a 20 hour flight away. I would love visiting and hopefully in college I will get to study abroad there. I don't know where my love of Australia grew from, I honestly don't. I just know I love the animals there, the scenery, the accent and all the open land. I can tell you some random facts about Australia but to be honest I haven't even done that much research on Australia, I just know I'm in love with it; if being in love with a country is possible. You may think you don't have to do research on a place to know about it and like it, but to me I want to know everything and everything so I research any and everything. My way of showing my love of something is to research the crap out of it, yet the only thing I haven't done that with is Australia. That could be because it's the one, it's the place for me. I don't need to research it to know I want to go there. It seems like such a lovely place and I also like that people don't occupy every inch if Australia. Yes it may be just a place but I've got to visit it before it gets too late. I don't know if I could ever leave America for good but I know if I did, it would be to my dear Australia.

#8 Writing Territories

Heights
Repetitive sounds
Learning to play guitar
People who don't care about others
That I'm slow at picking up/learning things
To go out of the country
Prep (Somewhat... I guess)
Riding my bike without a helmet
My TV (Then) My dog (Now)

Though I have a fear of heights, I am always on a constant conquest to conquer that fear and get past it in any way possible. Throughout the years I have been zip lining, gone on airplanes, gone on roller coasters, the top of tall buildings, etc. I hope to someday go skydiving, along with other small victories that signify my overcoming of my fear. I admit it as being a fear here, but most of the time I deny it as being a fear around my friends completely. I act as if there is no problem, but inside as I step onto the ledge over a 100 foot drop, I am having a panic attack. I view it as a positive thing that I am able to overcome my fears and that they do not hold me back from anything that I want to do. If I do not have enough willpower and allow the fear to hold me back one day, I ask that you will remind me of this blog post and tell me how I am missing out.

Writing Territories (Blog 8)

Writing Territories
Failure
Incompetence
No notable accomplishments
Social interactions
Overestimating my own abilities
Finding a job that meets my expectations
Geek
Driving
Video games and computer (then); video games and computer (now)
Procrastination

Social interactions, to put it simply, are something that, outside of the internet, I do not understand. Supposedly, there are many more facets to it than simply just the words leaving one's mouth, including body language, tone of voice, and emotional reactions. Furthermore, unlike on the internet where I have the time to properly formulate my responses, one-on-one conversation face-to-face involves thinking up proper reactions immediately. Not to mention, there are many references to popular culture that I am apparently supposed to understand and respond to properly which is much harder to explain to someone's face that I do in fact not get the reference than to someone online, usually because online, he or she is able to link me to a picture or youtube video of what he or she is referencing. Worse yet, and perhaps the most unconquerable issue so far, are slang words and phrases used in real life that are not at all used on the internet, and the moment it becomes obvious that I am not familiar with these, conversations tend to be awkward. All of these factors contribute to my overall discomfort with face-to-face conversation as I am constantly worried that others will judge me for not understanding basic slang and other typical conventions of conversation to the point that it stresses me out quite a bit. Lastly, it is rare that I find others interested in the same topics as I am, so even if I do manage to navigate around the battlefield of conversation, the conversation itself often ends abruptly as neither of us find common interests. It is for these reasons that I typically avoid conversation whenever it is possible and as a result, why the art of social interaction will probably continue to remain a mystery to me for quite a long time.

writing territories

writing territories

clowns

hypocrites

i'm not dead yet

my mom

that my jogie is going to die. period.

marrying a southern man and having really cute kids

being a princess

trusting people

then-my blankie now-friendships & my blankie

trust

one of my greatest sorrows in my life is knowing that my grandfather (jogie) is going to die. he is not sick or anything but he's 65 and it would be naive of me to think that he was going to live forever. my jogie is my favorite family member, above my parents, siblings, aunts, cousins, everyone and if i could move out and live with him and my gramma i would be perfectly happy. ever since i was little my jogie and i have had a special bond, it may be because he was the dominant male in my life because my dad was never around, and it may be because my jogie and i are so much alike. no matter the reason my jogie and i are very close and the thought that one day he will not be here with me anymore saddens me, i have accepted that my parents one day will die and although i will be very sad, that sadness will not compare to the sorrow, heartache, and grief i will have when my jogie dies. but for the time being all i can do is enjoy the time i have with him, this summer we are going skydiving, after that i will have a real accomplishment!

Writing Territories

Spiders
When people look over my shoulder to look on my phone
Cool programs I have gotten to do
How some technology works
Seeing people upset
Traveling
Babbling 
Swimming for the first time
Then- Blanket, Now- Cell Phone
Time Management/procrastination

They have eight legs. They can bite. They have way too many eyes. How could anybody not be scared of the creepy, crawly spider? Though I know that my fear of even the non-poisonous spiders around me is irrational, I cannot help it, spiders are just scary. Many people always say ask, why are you scared of something that can do you no harm? I simply do not know the answer, but I just look at the unpleasant creature and picture it crawling on me and get the jitters. I am not so scared of spiders that I will scream, cry, or freak out if I see one, but I will be startled. For some reason, spiders just get to me, more so than any other bug I have encountered thus far. With the Halloween season in the air I should be prepared to see more spiders because many people decorate their houses with fake ones for the festivities. I guess they too understand how spooky spiders are.

#8

Fears- spiders
Annoyances- opinionated people who can't see the other side
Accomplishments- two time state champion
Confusions- other peoples stubbornness
Sorrows- uptightness
Dreams- law
Idiosyncrasies- athlete
Risks- lying
Beloved Possessions- stuffed raccoon Miku (then), my car(now)
Problems- motivation

Problems-
At a rather unfortunate time in my young life I am experiencing an intense lack in interest and motivation for most things related too or associated with school. I wouldn't call it anything close to a depression because it relates solely to school. Leading up to one of the biggest processes I will face in my life it is greatly disappointing to me that my brain's school related work ethic cannot match its ability. I pray that when college comes around I will be able to pull myself out of this slump but I fear that it will not be possible and that my dreams could float away from me to the point where I may never be able to recover them and I could lose some great opportunities that might occur later on in my life.
Every high schooler has their fair share of minor problems, but I am deathly afraid that this problem is not so minor and may have a larger more negative impact on my life that I could ever imagine.

#8

Loneliness

Stupidity

None yet

Marriage

love capability

happy life
ketchup usage
choices of entertainment
nothing(then or now)
motivation

My idiosyncrasy is ketchup usage. I think it’s the best condiment ever created. It tastes good on anything, from french fries to spaghetti. But not only do I put it on everything, I also use huge amounts of it. My lunch table is constantly joking about the excessive amounts on my chicken patty. Three packets go in the sandwich, another in my hand to be squirted on before each bite. When going to other countries, I have found that (if they even sell any) their ketchup is not nearly as good. I have started bringing packets along with me during travel. Also, during eighth grade, I would carry ketchup in my backpack for the days when the cafeteria ran out. This may seem disgusting, but I just can’t get enough of it. If the saying, “you are what you eat” were real, there is no doubt that I would be a bottle of ketchup.

 

Territories

Being alone emotionally and physically
Hypocrisy (especially when I'm the hypocrite)
Never met someone who wasn't my friend (except Dave, I don't like Dave (JK))
People
Never really done something remarkable
In Color, and do the things I want
Contradictorily logical yet rash
Laziness
My ds lite (then), great friends (now)
Laziness

I have always felt that people are my friends I mean what are we if we don't have friends. Isn't that a boring existence? to live alone? I mean I couldn't do it you can see my fear, I hate being alone. I know that some may be very reluctant to let others in but my problem is that I have a hard time being alone. I feel like I need someone to give me encouragement and feedback every step of the way so I let everyone in even if I shouldn't and it all blows up in my face. Wow. That was uh really overly personal please no one read this. Anyway back to what I was saying. As for those of us who are reluctant we all need, sorry to be cliche but, "somebody to lean on" I couldnt do without a person or people that is why I am so thankful for new friends. Wow this has really derailed but I'm glad I got this off my chest in a hopefully unread, yet accessible manner.