Sunday, March 17, 2013

My name is Asher Lev

An orthodox Jewish artist painting Picasso-style crucifixions is not exactly what most people would think of as their "ideal character." Yet, there's something about the story of Asher Lev that really draws me in. I'm not sure if its the fact that he is an artist (there's nothing more on this planet I would love than to have artistic abilities), or the fact that he stays true to his identity in the face of opposition, or maybe it's the firm devotion he has in his faith even as his faith seeks to reject him. I don't know what it is about that boy Asher Lev, but I want to be him.

Well honestly, I guess what I really want is not to be Asher Lev, but to have something, some integral part of me, that I can hold on to even in the midst of being challenged by others. What I want is the chance to retain my integrity and identity in the face of opposition. What I want is to be able to show the world that who I am is not defined by your desires and that I don't need anyone's approval or validation to be myself. Asher Lev got that chance when his entire family and community turned against him because he was an artist and they were Hasidic Jews. And Asher Lev got to show his entire community that Judaism and art were not irreconcilable. And I think that's what makes me want to be him. I want a chance to prove myself. I want a chance to show everyone that I am not defined by my sexuality, race, gender identity, economic status, or any other of the sixteen thousand labels there are in this world. I want the chance to give a "fuck the patriarchy" (sorry) styled shout to the world and finally establish the fact that nobody in this world, other than me, can tell me who I am.

See, Asher Lev could do it. I want to do it too.

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