Sunday, October 21, 2012

"The Most Human, Human Being"



Writing Territories
Fears - Heights, mediocrity
Annoyances - Doing something because other people do/don't, breaking the spine on books, dog-earing books...
Accomplishments - Being in the classes that I am, keeping friends
Confusions - How to be honest without also hurting peoples' feelings
Sorrows - Average, mediocre, etc
Dreams - To get one. Alt ver: move to a big city such as Chicago and also to travel the world.
Idiosyncrasies - Shipping
Risks - College (anything and everything) not knowing what to do with my life
Beloved Possessions, Now and Then - Box of memories (then), laptop (now)
Problems - See sorrows, inability to distinguish myself

Music floats from her speakers as she sits typing at her computer. A look over her shoulder would probably give a glimpse of a blog, maybe an instant messenger conversation. Maybe she's not even writing, maybe she's simply reading something, a website of some sort or maybe it's a fanfiction for her favorite show. The music stops now and she doesn't notice it immediately, just continues to type on. Whether she eventually notices the lack of music or not doesn't matter, as right now she is lost in her routine, what she does. 

She flicks her trackpad up and flips to another tab on her computer, a big "Youtube" symbol emblazoned at the top. She flips to a different video, the generic strains of pop music begins over her speakers now. The title at the top of the page reveals the fact that it's a pairing video, not that it would have mattered anyway. She flips back to whatever she was doing before, maybe even begins singing, and who knows, maybe she's bad, maybe she isn't that terrible, but that's never been something she cared about, particularly. It's a love song of course (what music isn't, really?) and perhaps the song she sings is something she can relate to, or maybe it's something she has never experienced herself. 

All in all, nothing too interesting, nothing out of the ordinary. Any number of teenagers' names could be used here, to describe this scene. Their stories would be different, of course. It's not necessarily the fact that she's a cookie cutter, but more so the fact that she isn't particularly interesting. On a Sunday afternoon, she could be doing all kinds of things. On a Monday she could be doing whatever she wanted, granted it was after school. All of those days that she gets, she could use them to be something, to distinguish herself from the crowd. However, her activities and goals, while not the exact same as anyone else's, hardly bring anything new to the table. Maybe there's one thing she does better than some people; but even then, it's probably something useless. 

Does people ever talk about her? Probably, but what they say will remain unknown to her. What is said about her is not what she worries about. Indeed, her parents might actually even worry about that more than her. Like perhaps, when she wanted to get a really short haircut right before going into high school and her parents worried that it would earn her the reputation of "the lesbian", and that didn't actually happen (not that the haircut might have still been okay, it was completely terrible in case anyone cares). In general, her number two fear might simply be that she is mediocre at everything (except maybe going into panic attacks because of her number one fear, whatever that might be). 

Whoever this person might be, she appears to be very good at writing too much on her blog posts. And naming posts after quotes that don't even have anything to do with the post itself.

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